If you ask me (which of course you won't) I would say
the two great boons that science has bestowed on
mankind's female issue
Are her washing apparatus and the handy paper tissue.
I now qualify that statement
Without fear of a debatement
By adding you should keep the two quite separate
Disasters that follow their coming together being well
and truly known.
Picture our diligent housewife on Monday's chilly morn
Ratting through the cupboards for the clothes that have
Giving pocket linings and knicker legs the works
And other hiding places where the fiendish tissue lurks.
Despite this careful scrutiny
There's surely grounds for mutiny
When all the clothes get measled with a snow of
mangled paper -
How can she view this kindly, as a jolly little caper?
Having spent a day or more picking off the fragments
We really cannot blame her if she tears the clothes to ragments.
Is it any wonder, friends, her temper rages hot?
How many fuming mums out there would help her burn the lot?